Great Reasons to Be a Guy

2006-08-21 07:21:20

#1

sergeriver: Cowboy from Hell; +1,928|7075|Argentina

Whoever wrote it is damn right.

Great Reasons to Be a Guy:

Phone Conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

Dry cleaners and hair cutters don't rob you blind.

You can go to the bathroom without a support group.

You can leave the motel bed unmade.

You can kill your own food.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.

If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You don't have to clean if the meter reader is coming.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking: "He must be mad at me."

Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.

Wedding dress - $2,000. Tuxedo rental - 75 bucks.

You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift.

If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.

Your pals will never trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"

You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.

You know which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You don't have to shave below your neck.

Gas (at either end) is cool.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

Last edited by sergeriver (2006-08-21 07:22:14)

2006-08-21 07:25:46

#2

jkohlc: 2142th Whore; +214|6844|Singapore

you have a boom stick

2006-08-21 07:26:00

#3

loonitic: ...is a potty mouth; +286|6852|Valhalla

Too True
Another one - You can take a slash standing up

2006-08-21 07:26:59

#4

Cbass: Kick His Ass!; +371|7012|Howell, Mi USA

So true

https://bf3s.com/sigs/bb53a522780eff5b30ba3252d44932cc2f5b8c4f.png

2006-08-21 07:58:50

#5

FFLink: There is.; +1,380|7009|Devon, England

lmao, nice

2006-08-21 08:35:44

#6

Wasder: Resident Emo Hater; +139|6993|Moscow, Russia

We've got to be fair, do we?

Great Reasons To be a girl:

* Free dinners.
* You can cry without pretending there's something in your contact.
* Speeding ticket? What's that?
* You actually get extra points for sitting on your butt, watching sports.
* If you're a lousy athlete, you don't have to question your worth as a human being.
* A new lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life.
* In high school, you never had to walk down the hall with your binder strategically positioned.
* If you have to be home in time for Ally McBeal, you can say so, out loud.
* If you're not making enough money, you can blame the glass ceiling.
* If you're not very attractive, you can fool 'em with makeup.
* If you use self-tanner, it doesn't necessarily mean you're a big loser.
* You could possibly live your whole life without ever taking a group shower.
* Brad Pitt.
* You don't have to fart to amuse yourself.
* You'll never have to decide where to hide your nose-hair clippers.
* When you take off your shoes, nobody passes out.
* If the person you're dating is much better at something than you are, you don't have to break up with him.
* If you think the person your dating really likes you, you don't have to break up with him.
* If you don't shave, no one will know.
* If you're dumb, some people will find it cute.
* You don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
* You can dress yourself.
* Your hair is yours to keep.
* If you ARE bald, people will think you did it on purpose, and you're really chic.
* You don't have to pretend to like cigars.
* You'll never have to blow 2 months salary on anything.
* If you marry someone 20 years younger, you know you look like an idiot.
* You're rarely compelled to scream at the TV.
* You and your friends don't have to get totally wasted in order to share your feelings.
* If you pick up the check once in a while, that's plenty.
* Sitting and watching people is all the entertainment you need.
* Your friend won't think you're weird when you ask if there's spinach in your teeth.
* When you get a million catalogues in the mail, it's a good thing.
* Sometimes, chocolate truly can solve all your problems.
* If you're under 6', you don't have to lie about it.
* You'll never regret piercing your ears.
* You can fully assess someone just by looking at his or her shoes.
* You'll never discover you've been fooled by a Wonderbra.
* You don't have hair on your back.
* If anything on your body isn't as big as it should be, you can get implants.
* You can tell which glass was yours by the lipstick mark.
* If you have big ears, no one has to know.
* You can be attracted to someone just because they're really funny.
* You can borrow your spouse's clothes and it doesn't mean you belong on Jerry Springer.

Still, it rocks to be a guy!

2006-08-21 09:51:46