I hate my job/I need a job/I've got an interview MEGATHREAD

2022-09-03 13:36:32

#2551

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

Fell in love with Brooklyn. Transferring my license to NY is hard and I have built up a good base at my current place. I need to just patiently stick around and eventually I will make it to leadership and a nice pension. But it would be cool to live in that part of the city. In another time maybe.

2022-09-06 10:27:27

#2552

KEN-JENNINGS: I am all that is MOD!; +2,978|6847|949

KEN-JENNINGS wrote:
The first casualty has been laid to rest in this saga. One of the Accounts Payable people was pushed off the iceberg by the fatty penguins at corporate.

I think I am in the clear, but I wouldn't be surprised if there's another sacrifice to the corporate compliance gods.

Here's a protip: never put onlyfans charges onto a corporate credit card. It will result in numerous people cringing as the question, "what is onlyfans?" is answered in a corporate boardroom.

Second casualty- VP of Financial Reporting. Announced Friday afternoon right before the long weekend.

I'd be lying if I don't feel nervous that I may be let go too.

2022-09-06 12:09:57

#2553

unnamednewbie13: Moderator; +2,053|6987|PNW

CEO not going to take responsibility for the excesses of their underlings and pen a resignation letter?

2022-09-06 12:30:59

#2554

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

KEN-JENNINGS wrote:
KEN-JENNINGS wrote:
The first casualty has been laid to rest in this saga. One of the Accounts Payable people was pushed off the iceberg by the fatty penguins at corporate.

I think I am in the clear, but I wouldn't be surprised if there's another sacrifice to the corporate compliance gods.

Here's a protip: never put onlyfans charges onto a corporate credit card. It will result in numerous people cringing as the question, "what is onlyfans?" is answered in a corporate boardroom.
Second casualty- VP of Financial Reporting. Announced Friday afternoon right before the long weekend.

I'd be lying if I don't feel nervous that I may be let go too.

Did the stealing start under your watch? You were the one that found and reported it. If I was leadership, I wouldn't cut the throat of the guy who uncovered the fraud. But then again...I am not a pig man.

2022-09-06 13:22:28

#2555

KEN-JENNINGS: I am all that is MOD!; +2,978|6847|949

Stealing started before I got here, but I uncovered it during an audit of my department. I was doing the right thing!

My company is owned by a ruthless private equity firm that will extract their pound of flesh if that's their prerogative.

2022-09-06 13:28:41

#2556

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

You were doing the right thing. Have faith! Maybe this could all shake out in your favor. Say 10 hail Mary's and blow a priest just to be sure.

2022-09-06 15:07:57

#2557

RTHKI: mmmf mmmf mmmf; +1,741|6952|Oxferd Ohire

private equity is fun*

*not

2022-09-06 15:40:40

#2558

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

Show me where Elon Musk touched you.

2022-09-06 16:26:24

#2559

Dauntless: Admin; +2,249|6957|London

Hope everything works out Ken.
Surely you'll be in the clear if you uncovered it all, if they fire you they'll just be encouraging people to hide problems.

2022-09-07 03:24:50

#2560

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,813|6321|eXtreme to the maX

KEN-JENNINGS wrote:
My company is owned by a ruthless private equity firm that will extract their pound of flesh if that's their prerogative.

If it helps you feel better I'm pretty sure the PE company which bought my last workplace must be at their wits end about now.
The honcho who drove the acquisition and was put in to manage it got the chop for sure and very suddenly.
The CFO of the acquired company got fired also for his lies, but then he would have sold all his shares and wouldn't have cared.

Protip: Doing due diligence on the numbers tells you fuck all.

Fuck Israel

2022-09-07 12:50:33

#2561

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

My boss offered me a new project. Paid but this is especially cool. Good opportunity to get introduced to some new circles.

2022-09-09 06:38:16

#2562

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

I have an aide now. They are with me the whole day. I am their boss.

Rest easy, I am not a jerk to subs. I may try to sleep with them. But I don't ask them to do anything. They can just sit there 95% of the time for all I care. My class sizes are like 10 kids each. I don't need the aide but it is cool.

My aide is an immigrant from the Middle East in his 40s or 50s. I hope his parents aren't cousins.

2022-09-18 06:57:53

#2563

unnamednewbie13: Moderator; +2,053|6987|PNW

Teacher in Japan arrested for mixing bleach into school lunch
https://nextshark.com/teacher-arrested- … nto-lunch/

Why are teachers like this?

2022-09-18 20:59:05

#2564

Dauntless: Admin; +2,249|6957|London

It makes sense if you read the whole story:
"I was upset because I was not assigned as a homeroom teacher of a class I had been in charge of until March,” she was quoted as saying.

2022-09-18 22:56:25

#2565

unnamednewbie13: Moderator; +2,053|6987|PNW

Imagine being late on an assignment.

2022-09-19 13:45:47

#2566

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

This is a dark thought but there is going to eventually be a school incident somewhere in the country where a School Resource Officer or 2nd Amendment enthusiast instructor offs some kids and/or coworkers. I wonder what solution people would think up once the "good guy with a gun" can't be trusted either.

2022-09-19 13:55:22

#2567

SuperJail Warden: Gone Forever; +640|3935

When it happens I hope only a handful of teachers are hurt in a scandalous story of workplace romance.
...

I would die happy if I could make love to the 25 year old and then both of us get killed in a murder suicide by her bipolar boyfriend while on the clock.

https://y.yarn.co/5d4db0ef-59c8-4b08-a64f-2f535af1c333_text.gif

Maybe Dilbert can buy us a bench with our names. Two star crossed lovers.

2022-10-05 01:46:56

#2568

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,813|6321|eXtreme to the maX

Apparently I'm a project manager now - which is to say I have to herd multiple groups of cats simultaneously to rescue the flagship product from a litany of problems, all of which are stupid and shouldn't have happened.

I shall fist with an iron rule.

Fuck Israel

2022-10-05 01:59:47

#2569

uziq: Member; +493|3667

wow, mid-40s and you made it to project management! you'll be talking about Agile and Lean six sigma in no time!

you should sell your bosses on 'continuous improvement', they love that.

Last edited by uziq (2022-10-05 02:00:48)

2022-10-05 02:03:12

#2570

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,813|6321|eXtreme to the maX

No, they're really boring.

I'd be happier playing with my robots TBH but I see loads of jobs for project managers and they're well paid and a doddle so yeah I dunno.

Fuck Israel

2022-10-05 02:13:47

#2571

uziq: Member; +493|3667

i've been doing project management for the last 4–5 years, mostly to bump up my annual bonus package, performance reviews love that sort of 'initiative taking'. sitting through the corporate jargon of project management frameworks and 'lean sigma' accreditation is truly one of the most mindnumbing things ever.

my next paygrade is being a managing editor and moving away from books and text and authors to excel spreadsheets and budgeting. that includes a whole lot more project management.

i think organisations that take up kanban boards and continuous improvement and all the rest of that malarky tend to get lost in the momentum of it all. every year i can see a few mid-level managers starting 10+ projects for the sake of their next promotion or annual review. half of them ever make any significant dents. just stupid intra-organisational bullshit and constant project churn for the sake of it. i've hollowed my own niche being the 'language guru' and quality guy, instead. it's not worth the extra £10-15k a year for me to become some gibbering idiot updating continuous improvement dashboards all day long.

2022-10-05 02:32:28

#2572

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,813|6321|eXtreme to the maX

I've been doing project management of various sorts from day one of my, um, 'career' and am fully aware of the difference between actual project management and the froth which it tends to drown in, and I've seen plenty of projects which delivered all the pie charts and fishbone diagrams but failed utterly because something important got lost - like the product needed to work, or not kill people, or failed to kill people.

Higher level management does sometimes need the kind of bullshit metrics it produces though, and when an operation is 99.9% efficient its really hard to compete with a competitor which is 99.95% efficient, that last 0.05% does come out of all the team standups and second by second process analysis.

Fuck Israel

2022-10-05 02:38:11

#2573

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,813|6321|eXtreme to the maX

Organisational decision making is the more important part of project management, the actual management part being the mundane process of keeping everything jogging along to a plan.

Getting people together and maneuvering them into
a) Taking some kind of decision
b) Taking a decision everyone can get behind
c) Taking the right decision
Is hard, thank god my company has me to do it.

Fuck Israel

2022-10-05 02:57:25

#2574

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,813|6321|eXtreme to the maX

The Chinese girl in the adjacent desk, with the nice voice, who is from Wuhan, went down with covid on Sunday.

She passed by to pick up her laptop outside, apparently she has cat ears on her Audi.

Feeling very conflicted right now.

Fuck Israel

2022-10-14 05:51:44

#2575

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,813|6321|eXtreme to the maX

Things like this could actually tip me over the edge

Fuck Israel

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KEN-JENNINGS wrote:

KEN-JENNINGS wrote:

KEN-JENNINGS wrote:

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