sapper_dago
Member
+-1|6872|Schofield BArracks, Hawaii
You guys forgot the most important of them all: When you take 3 major flags from the enemy...your teammates will never come help you defend them.
l41e
Member
+677|6869

"The Ammo Bag". Enjoy.

8x5x2 ammunition bag.

Contents:

-80 rounds of tank 120/125mm cannon shells, 900 25/23/30mm autocannon shells, 12 Stinger/IGLA/9K111 AA missiles
-6 SRAWs and 6 ERYX tubes
-9x18, 9x19, 5.8x23, 4.6x30, 5.56x45, 7.62x39, 7.62x51, and 7.62x54, all pre-packaged in the appropriate magazines

Other features:
-Made in Switzerland and thus is available to all nations
-.50 BMG rounds on top of bag have anti-gravity properties
-Projects holographic ammo logo approximately 12 inches above bag
-Projects holographic high-technology distance marker approximately 18 inches above bag using GPS and Wi-Fi technology to project to individual soldiers
-Enviromentally friendly: instantly and completely biodegrades upon use.
-Proprietary regeneration ability (limited to 5 deployed at one time due to technology issues)

Call 000-000-0000 today to order yours!

Last edited by k30dxedle (2006-03-30 12:32:43)

buford
Member
+3|6820
500 lb bombs, 50 cal ammo, and A2A missiles can levitate over carriers and runways directly into the cradles of aircraft 100 feet in the air flying at 400 MPH.

A 30 ton tank cannot knock down a fence, light post, or gate.  Nor can it run over a wrecked jeep.

Flashbang grenades emit a special wavelength of light that passes through your skull to blind you even if you're looking the other way.  This light also passes through chobbam armor and steel to blind tank drivers.

No vehicle uses fuel, except UAV's and they only carry 60 seconds worth.

Anti-air missles are so heavy that they can only be ground mounted.  There's no such thing as a hand-held Stinger.

Choppers are plated with 3 inches of armor, such that they can withstand 3 or 4 direct hits from the cannon of a main battle tank.  This does not affect their flying ability.

Certain bullets can turn and hit you after you've run around a corner.

Dune buggies have suspensions designed by Cadillac, but 4wheelers have magic-glue tires, and can pull 3 g's on the skidpad.

Sniper rifles fire special bullets that defy gravity, but the cannon of a tank will have 2 feet of drop over 100 yards.  A sniper 50 cal round can penetrate chopper windows, but 25mm from an APC cannot.

APC rockets fly at 100 MPH, tank cannon rounds at 200 MPH.

Soldires can run faster than an APC can drive in reverse.

Inflatable boats have armored hulls that can take multiple hits from a 50 cal gun without sinking.

A cannon round from a main battle tank wil not even dent the 18 gauge sheet metal of a UAV trailer, nor will it so much as knock a satellite dish out of alignment.  Anti-armor rockets and RPG's are similarly ineffectual.

Aircraft carriers have no radar for their AA gunners.


And the most amazing physics!:

The whole game is stealth to other game developers.  For over 3 years, no other game developer has noticed that players like flying vehicles, driving stuff over land and through water, and running and gunning in the same game.  That's why we still have video glitches, crappy code, and outdated physics....only EA, Dice, and the players know the game exists!   That silly Carmack!  He thinks 20% more polygons is the way to riches, because he can't SEE BF2!

Last edited by buford (2006-04-03 16:32:51)

shurlok
Member
+0|6817|uk lancashire
all so true
walyl135
Member
+7|6854|(UK) SOUTH LONDON GUV'NOR
Heres another one: the law states that if you mis with the first bullet all the rest will miss as well

Newtons law of physics says "for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction"

this is true when you go to cap a flag and the falg yuo just spawned at gets capped by the other team
[DEI]Bart
fire at will!!!
+76|6934|Leiden, Holland for the n00bs

k30dxedle wrote:

"The Ammo Bag". Enjoy.


-Projects holographic ammo logo approximately 12 inches above bag
-Projects holographic high-technology distance marker approximately 18 inches above bag using GPS and Wi-Fi technology to project to individual soldiers
if you press left Alt then the 3D map pictures will disppear from the game.
[DEI]Bart
fire at will!!!
+76|6934|Leiden, Holland for the n00bs

buford wrote:

No vehicle uses fuel, except UAV's and they only carry 60 seconds worth.
so you would say that every vehicle drives 1:0.5, you never timed a round did you, the avarage round has a time of say  half an hour, have you ever ever saw a vehicle that couldnt fly/drive shorter than that (plus that if it is destroyed it comes again with a full fuel tank).
topal63
. . .
+533|6939

[DEI]Bart wrote:

k30dxedle wrote:

"The Ammo Bag". Enjoy.


-Projects holographic ammo logo approximately 12 inches above bag
-Projects holographic high-technology distance marker approximately 18 inches above bag using GPS and Wi-Fi technology to project to individual soldiers
if you press left Alt then the 3D map pictures will disppear from the game.
and

[DEI]Bart wrote:

buford wrote:

No vehicle uses fuel, except UAV's and they only carry 60 seconds worth.
so you would say that every vehicle drives 1:0.5, you never timed a round did you, the avarage round has a time of say  half an hour, have you ever ever saw a vehicle that couldnt fly/drive shorter than that (plus that if it is destroyed it comes again with a full fuel tank).
You are a funny kid. LOL
Majjiks
Member
+0|6816
Now this is funny
Defiance
Member
+438|6892

When you get 1 kill away from an expert badge, your teammates will cap the last point on the map and winning the game.
minus_2
Member
+0|6874

KyanWan wrote:

82.  You're in the chopper with 5 squadmembers - and 1 non-squadmember pilot - who just bailed ....
So true Only You forgot to plug UR Flight stick in so fail misserably at trying to fly with Keyboard & Mouse!

[DEI]Bart
fire at will!!!
+76|6934|Leiden, Holland for the n00bs
nr###### when your an engie, after you climed up 4 ladder jumped over wide gaps and disabled 2 claymores, right before you are about to knive the sniper youre teamkilled by a friendly snipe who tried to kill your target.
st3r
Member
+0|6811|Wellington
38.Confucious say: Man with handful of wheat will hit enemy more than with M229 SAW.


It is actually a m249 Saw. But there all great.

Well worth reading!
Spark
liquid fluoride thorium reactor
+874|6896|Canberra, AUS
The round will end when you have 17 knife/pistol kills, or 9 repair points, or 39 kills, or whatever.'

Oh, and having the War College Ribbon puts you on the EA shortlist for a reset.
The paradox is only a conflict between reality and your feeling what reality ought to be.
~ Richard Feynman
UON
Junglist Massive
+223|6875

=KBO=FragAbsorber wrote:

TSal2111 wrote:

100.  When you join a server at the start of your gaming session, you will be immediately assigned to the losing team with 1 ticket remaining.
Worse - When you've played through an entire map, working together well with your team to capture all enemy flags, and just need to hund down the reaming half-dozen or so enemies still alive, youwill get killed, then teamswitched to the losing side...
Or worse... teamkilled and switched to the losing side.
Foxhoundmgw
Man of Moebius Morals
+71|6802|Nottingham, UK
No no, it's not dead, it's, it's restin'! Remarkable thread, The Scientific Laws of Battlefield 2, idn'it, ay?
LordDragonclaw
RPK-74 Whore
+26|6804
Those are hilarous and true. ROFL Its just so funny that all that is true
JahManRed
wank
+646|6849|IRELAND

+1 karma
[CANADA]_Zenmaster
Pope Picard II
+473|6967

|CCCCCDark_Helmet wrote:

SO FUNNY!!!!

The only time in the game ever that u will get lag is when u run right around the corner and there happen to be 6 guys with GL's.

Probably the only cool squad that u will ever join that actually cooperates together will most likely be named
"POOP SQUAD"

The Strike at Karkand map seems to be populated with lots of boats and water vehicles.

Actually it is "BUTTSECKS."
Sondernkommando
Member
+22|6937
151.  You will play magnificently, factoring hugely in your team's pending victory.  Then, upon a chance death, you will be Autobalanced by the Server to the other team just in time to take the loss.


I swear this has happened to me twenty times.
Skiller_jan
Member
+-1|6848
i agree with you all
AmBiTiOnZ23
Shoot that guy ->
+29|6962
Dont know what number but here goes one...

Soldiers can fire a Light Machine Gun with unbelieveable accuracy while upside-down and rolling to their left without even finishing their roll first.
908741059871059781
Sheep of War
+40|6864
Auto-balance keeps it fair by always placing you on the losing team

There is no such thing as hiding;  that red sign above your head says so

Committing suicide to spawn on your squad leader is the best revenge on him, it ensures he will be dead before you get the chance

Page down is the largest button on every single keyboard in battlefield

Snipers conceal themselves through the red name bug

If claymores could walk, they would be smarter than the tart that throws them everywhere
Puppy
Member
+11|6883
aww man that was bloody hilarious good job
Airwolf
Latter Alcoholic
+287|6941|Scotland
When both Teams have just 1 ticket left, we all know that the death of one guy can determine whether you win or lose.

So you're trying to find one guy, and this guy on your team with the Jackhammer jumps round the corner and pumps you with it, and has the cheek to say sorry!

Chinese Team have won the round! (1-0)

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