[IFF]DemonDave
Member
+20|6878|hampshire england
a man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.



The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a
coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have the same,"says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be £9.40 please," she says and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls
out the exact amount for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries, and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."

Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact amount.

For a while this becomes routine until the two enter again later in the week. "The usual?" asks the waitress. "No, this time it's a treat, so i will have a steak, baked potato, and salad," says the man.

" Yep! Same," says the ostrich.



Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be £32.62."
Once again the man pulls the exact amount out of his pocket and
places it on the table.

The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact money from your pocket every time?"

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was clearing the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.


My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put
my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always
be there."


That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish
for a couple of million pounds or something, but you'll always be as
rich as you want for as long as you live!"



"That's right. Whether it's a  pint of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.


The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?"

The man sighs, pauses, and replies, "My second wish was for a
tall bird with a big arse and long legs who agrees with everything I say."
DoctorFruitloop
Level 13 Wrongdoer
+515|6859|Doncaster, UK
Lol +1
Cybargs
Moderated
+2,285|7029
roflmao... the genie is teh literallsz
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Sydney
2λчиэλ
+783|7156|Reykjavík, Iceland.
LOL I've heard an Icelandic version of it aswell, which is even better.
max
Vela Incident
+1,652|6880|NYC / Hamburg

PBAsydney wrote:

LOL I've heard an Icelandic version of it aswell, which is even better.
mind to tell it?

and yes: +1

Last edited by max (2006-07-19 04:03:17)

once upon a midnight dreary, while i pron surfed, weak and weary, over many a strange and spurious site of ' hot  xxx galore'. While i clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning, and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour, " 'Tis not possible!", i muttered, " give me back my free hardcore!"..... quoth the server, 404.
Pop To Ster
Philosiraptor
+45|6845|Edmonds, WA
I wonder what he does every night...=/
Sydney
2λчиэλ
+783|7156|Reykjavík, Iceland.

max wrote:

PBAsydney wrote:

LOL I've heard an Icelandic version of it aswell, which is even better.
mind to tell it?

and yes: +1
It wouldn't work, it's about a hearing impaired Genie, and things that rhyme in Icelandic don't rhyme in English...
Whatever I'll tell it.

A man came walking into a bar with a miniture pony on his shoulder, people didn't ask him why he had it out of sheer courtesy, he came into the bar the next day aswell and noone asked him, the third day this one man just couldn't hold it anymore, so he asked him why he always had that pony on him.

The man with the pony told him to follow him back to his house, and showed him his lamp with a genie in, and allowed him to make a wish aswell.

So he wished that his pockets would always be full of money, granted his pockets instnatly got filled with dices
(Icelandic, Money: Peningar, Dices: Teningar)

He looked at him, his face one big question mark, then the owner of the lamp said:
"Yes, I know he's hearing impaired, I did wish for a 10 inch penis."
(Icelandic, Pony: Trippi, Penis: Tippi)

As I said, not really funny unless you speak Icelandic.
Cybargs
Moderated
+2,285|7029
its kinda funny w/ the translation though
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Vub
The Power of Two
+188|6807|Sydney, Australia
If you like this joke, you'll absolutely love this one.

http://forums.bf2s.com/viewtopic.php?id=35580
1927
The oldest chav in the world
+2,423|6986|Cardiff, Capital of Wales
Wanna borrow that coat of mine??
DonFck
Hibernator
+3,227|6944|Finland

Vub wrote:

If you like this joke, you'll absolutely love this one.

http://forums.bf2s.com/viewtopic.php?id=35580
DON'T GO THERE!
I need around tree fiddy.
jkohlc
2142th Whore
+214|6839|Singapore
ostriches are cute btw
DonFck
Hibernator
+3,227|6944|Finland

jkohlc wrote:

ostriches are cute btw
So you'd tap that? 
I need around tree fiddy.
Cybargs
Moderated
+2,285|7029

DonFck wrote:

jkohlc wrote:

ostriches are cute btw
So you'd tap that? 
thats what hes saying
https://cache.www.gametracker.com/server_info/203.46.105.23:21300/b_350_20_692108_381007_FFFFFF_000000.png
polarbearz
Raiders of the Lost Bear
+-1,474|7102|Singapore

DonFck wrote:

Vub wrote:

If you like this joke, you'll absolutely love this one.

http://forums.bf2s.com/viewtopic.php?id=35580
DON'T GO THERE!
don't. please god.
joker3327
=IBF2=
+305|6911|Cheshire. UK
Good one...birighten the day lol +1

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